Just a Throw Back

Rhetoric narratives are very fun in my opinion because there is no limits to adding in your own style to the writing in order to give the full experience of the event being displayed. I wrote a very personal narrative in my junior year of high school and I used to be afraid to show it to people -- I am now proud to share this story. I do not see it as strange anymore, I see it as me finding my strength. Because we are working on a narrative in class I thought I could share my narrative for everyone to read and see a side of myself that not many people are aware of. To add additional context this assignment was to be written in a way where the problem that is being overcome is revealed only in the end. Enjoy :) .

A Friend

           I typically hear that the toughest battle in a person’s life will be with themselves, I never really understood when anyone said this, I would just nod my head in agreement because of how wise it sounded. Even now I still believe this phrase can be understood in many different ways as it does for me. The experience that allowed me to first understand this phrase definitely had a strong meaningful impact on my life, more importantly it allowed me to understand and find myself.
Mid-December of 2014 I stumbled upon who became to be my only friend for eight months; during this time I was going through a harsh break up. My friend, she was interesting, I had never met anyone like her before. Her words, often comforting in the beginning -- at least I believed so – but she was a deceiving and a dogmatic girl, there was never an end to her virulent thoughts. She acted sweet as if she was being supportive but her intentions were to debilitate me with her constant arguing and stubborn points of view. Every day our arguments became more one sided to where only she had a say on how I felt; she dictated my life and broke me down to tears every night with no regret or sympathy, yet I still told her everything.
           “I think I’m getting better, I think I might be fine without him” feeling at peace with myself after recovering for several months while resting on my bed who always had open arms for me             
“Are you kidding me? You obviously need him, you are obsessed with him!” here she goes again for the thousandth time, at this point not even caring for sugar coating and just attacking me with her opinions.
           “What… no I am not! I know it’s been hard but I know if I try I can get over him. Why do you always do this to me?” I usually never stood up for myself but I finally realized she was dragging me down. I had to make a change and stay strong.
           “You are a stupid child. You are capable of nothing, not love nor happiness, just stop trying. There is no point” Each time she spoke it was as if I was snow white eating a poison apple – my throat drying up, my eyes start to water, I get smaller and smaller, now only she speaks: my opinion is silenced. “That’s all you are good for, crying. You are worthless.”
           “NO! Stop it! Get out of my life and get out of my head you irritating piece of crap! I do not need you I have had enough! I am capable of anything I set my mind to, but you, because of you I cannot grow and I am sick and tired of all you have to say. You lying bastard!” I stood up and looked straight into her eyes my voice cracking each time I dared to yell louder.
           “You don’t know what you are saying, you can’t stand alone, haha you are pathetic. Don’t you know Vanessa? I am here to stay. I will never leave you whether you like –” her voice simmers down but it is mocking.
           “Shut up just shut up already! You are done here, you are not needed, get away, get away, just get away! Just stop talking and get away and never come back because I will not allow it ever!”  I cut her off, my fists clenched, eyes shut, heart pumping as fast as a cheetah runs, my words spill with passion every last one right before I stop to catch a breath. Pure silence – my heart slows down and I unclench my fists and I wipe away my tears and I look into the mirror, “You did it Vanessa, she is gone. You are a beautiful person and you will be so much better without her” I cannot help but smile and release a chuckle as I realize I have gained control of my mind, that I have found peace. I look again to the girl in the mirror: she looks tired worn out for she has won the battle. Her name is no longer anxiety; her name is Vanessa.